In what reality did THAT seem like a good idea?!

Also possibly titled: My son the Klingon...

The Klingon Prince

Bailey and his partner-in-crime Will sheepishly arrive at home last Friday with Bailey sporting a forehead from Star Trek. After my initial terror of possible head trauma I asked how it happened.... I should have not asked..

"I was hit with a golf ball."
"Why were you standing in the way while someone was swinging?!"

"Oh, we weren't playing golf. We were having a golf ball war and throwing them at each other."

WHAAAAAAAT????? Charles Darwin I am a believer! Why is the world not solely populated by females?

After literally sputtering partial profanities at both of them all I can manage to get out is, "You are SO stupid! Both of you!"

Not sure which one is Beavis...

The response from Beavis and Butthead: "heh! heh!"

Days later Bailey looks like a car crash victim... and STILL the only one upset is me....

And how was your day?

Oh, thanks for asking!

Today started with oldest son staggering to the car apparently still blinded from what I thought was merely an eyelash in his eye yesterday.... after reluctantly bringing him to the doctor where they had to "novocaine" his eye and remove some gross object that took two people to remove, they declared him to also have pinkeye. Yea!

Back home to drop of blind son and get goo to treat eye....

Husband (who has been hacking up portions of his lungs for a week) returns from doctor with the diagnosis: "It's pneumonia". Okay.....

Cancel all playdates, birthdays, sleepovers and other human interactions for the foreseeable future.

I sneak outside to collapse on grass and read my trashy magazine as far from the quarantine area as I can get when Riley comes out and asks, "Mom? Do you have tweezers?"

Huh? Tweezers? Why? Said child informs me (while blood is dripping from his mouth and covering his hands) that he thinks he spit his tooth in the trash.

"Well just get it out!" I say....(in a NOT AT ALL EXASPERATED VOICE)  I am then informed that the tooth must have come out while he was eating a rather LARGE oatmeal cookie and it is embedded somewhere in the glob of masticated mush he spit into the can.

Check. Getting the tweezers.... and some latex gloves....

And how was YOUR day so far?