Running Coach from Hell....

I am training for the Bridge to Bridge run in October. (10k but that is quite a stretch for "old Gina"). I have been getting up at 6:00am to run. Today, Riley decides he is going to go with me. Aww. Nice right?
So 2.5k into the run, Riley is not winded or remotely perspiring... he is actually SKIPPING next to me and chatting away as I drag my sorry cardiovascular system back from the brink of death!
At the end of the run he says that he thinks he can help me. A direct quote: "I think if I put a yoke on you, like an oxen, and I chased behind you with a pair of those fake chattery teeth on a stick, I could try to bite you with the teeth... and you could maybe run a bit faster."

Gee, thanks. That sounds super fun... and would not look at all strange. Also, you can kiss all your future birthday presents goodbye.